Monday, September 22, 2008

A Painting I did in High School Art


The Loudness of Silence


The Loudness of silence deafens me as rain poors from the sky.
I do not feel the dampness, but I know I'll never be dry.
Light lingers for a moment, and I ask myself why?
Why do I feel this urge to die.
Rain drops fall like bullets, shining silver in the pale moonlight;
driving themselves deep in to my skin with all their might.
I cover my ears and close my eyes tight.
My screams are lost in the night.
Blood is streaming down my face into my eyes.
A drop of blood for all the lies,
told by everyone who chose to hide;
and all those who can't make up their mind.
Tears of blood stream down my face.
Flood waters come to leave no trace,
of life that was here in this place.
All the light in the world seems to fade.
I was a good girl, always helped others and did what I was told.
I didn't get the chance to grow old.
Then one night came, dark and cold,
in came a man dressed in black and gold.
Fear rose in me like I never knew it could.
He jumped on me as if I should
know what this was all about and that I would
give into his demands just like I should.
I tried to break free, but his grip on me
was more than I could fight, he had me.
There was nothing to do but wait and see
what he could, what he would, do to me.
Now I am charged with blasphemy.
He is charged with adultry.
He's now in the penetentery,
and no more will he ever see of me.
Now I sit her with blood for tears,
in the silence of my fears.
It's been this way it seems for years,
and now the loudness of silence fill my ears.
My body lays limp as blood streaks my skin.
There are no thoughts of my own within.
They all douse me with kerosine and gin,
then light the fire hiding within.
I had no chance, people were set against me,
there was no way I could make them see,
that the true one to blame was he,
who took away my virginity.
Bullets of rain pelted down on my eyes,
stones of hatred began to fly,
lightning struck the distant sky,
all I could do was lay there and die.
The end has come, I now must part,
but before I do they take my heart.
They hang it from a tree branch nigh,
and offer my life to the eye in the sky.
The past must go, the future come,
and now my friends, my life is done.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Dark Abyss of Loneliness


Into the dark abyss of loneliness i crawl. Sweet dreams to the fairness of the blood rose. It does not want, it does not care. The blood rose is just there, lulling through time. The path of darkness precedes. Blood covers the wall. Little light shows through as the darkness covers all. Fairwell to the world of the living. Hello to the world of dreams. My world. A world where everything is possible, and nothing is impossible. Let me stay here. I'm welcome here. Do not wake me from my slumber, I wish to remain here forever. Let me crawl into the dark abyss of loneliness.

Loneliness Ensnares


Loneliness ensnares my mind as I try to break hold of the fear of being alone. I don't know what to do. There's nothing I can really do. Whatever happens happens, even i fI fear it. What will happen if I'm alone? Will I ever find that on, true love? Will I ever know what love is? Maybe. Who knows? I don't. But for now, I'll let loneliness ensnare my body and mind.

Friday, September 12, 2008

This is a video of our dogs. Princess, Annie, and Daisy Mae. They are all very special, and I love them dearly.
This is just a funny video I made of one of our dogs. Her name is Annie. We got her from the pound about 1 1/2 year ago. We fell in love with her the moment we saw her. She sat right in front of my brother and looked him right in the eye, and that was that. She's very food and toy motivated. She's very smart, and loves to cuddle. I hope you enjoy this video and much as I enjoyed making it.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Broken Hearted


I never knew what it was like to have a broken heart. That was, until I thought i had finally found love. As people can tell, that never happened. I don't know if it ever will. I saw him, and my heart would beat faster. Now I see him, and my heart drops. I don't know why I always do this. I always like the guys that it could never happen with.
I have the feeling I'll end up alone with 2 kids. I won't mind, I'll have a good, steady job, and be able to support them. I fear I'll never find someone to love me though. I've always had this fear. It's almost instilled in me genetically. I am not weak minded, but I do fear of being alone. I really don't know why. There are many women who are stong, and support their children by themselves.
I however do not know my strengths and abilities yet. I don't know what kind of mother I'll be. I don't know that I'll be strong enough. And that leaves me Broken Hearted.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Closterphobia of Stress

Every day, closterphobia breaks in to my subconcious. I don't notice it at first. Then, slowly, as the day goes on, I feel more like I'm suffocating. Each breath gets harder. I don't know why, but it happens. I can't seem to make it stop, it just... keeps coming back. I can't break free from its grasp, until I fall asleep. Sleep... the remedy for everything. When I wake up, my breathing is normal, I feel normal. But as the day goes on, the closterphobia returns.
Closterphobia, the fear of small spaces. My fear is being stuck in one spot in my life for too long, and never being able to break free. I want to have a life outside of school. I need to learn to balance my life better. But what can I do? How do I break free of the Closterphobia of Stress?

Friday, September 5, 2008

Sunset on Peru St.


Sunsets are one of the most beautiful things to watch. Most of th time, watching the sunset over the fields, we can watch a few deer grazing, or turkey's walking through. Sometimes we'll see a fox, or a coydog. One time, I was lucky enough to see a wolf. It was just a lone timber wolf. Large, grey, and prowling. He was gorgeous, majestic, and ever searching. Then, one morning, not that long ago, I heard a howl. It had been 7 years since there had been any trace of a wolf. We normally never have more than one, but I swear I heard two.
It was a dark starry night. The air was clear, and the trees were quiet. Then, out of the night, a howl broke the silence. My dog was on full alert, the howl recieving her full attention. She cocked her head, and pointed with her no, but stayed by me, in case the intruder decided to come near.
Sunsets on my road are amazing. Living in the country is probably the best hing on earth.

Monday, September 1, 2008

This is a video I made. It's suppossed to represent the fact that the wild horses of America are being slaughtered and outnumberd by mankind. No matter what anyone has to say, there is still horse-slaughter in America. People also don't realize that since horses are not raised as food animals, they are injected with steroids and other drugs to make them stronger or faster, making it poisoness for anyone to eat. France, Belgium and Russia are 3 of the worlds biggest buyer of horse meat. They consider it a delicacy. If only they knew what went into most of the horses that are slaughtered. More often than not, the horse that is slaughtered is an old racer, pacer, cart pony, or show horse that "messed up" one time, when it was really the riders fault, and they didn't want to take the blame. Also, many of the mare that go into slaughterhouses have foal inside them. What do they do with the foals you may ask? They cut them out of the mother, and while the foal is still breathing, they throw it in a trashcan to be processed later, and let it suffocate in its own juices. How do I know this? I wrote a 10 page paper on it.

Scene From Step Up 2 The Streets

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1G3i7SUDiO0&feature=related

More art in motion. What do you think?